英文作文改进~谢.New term,new self After two months break the routine of school life ,another new term has begin,and we have to gone through a lot of things.With each new term comes the opportunity for change .We should have a study plan to pro

英文作文改进~谢.New term,new self After two months break the routine of school life ,another new term has begin,and we have to gone through a lot of things.With each new term comes the opportunity for change .We should have a study plan to pro
英文作文改进~谢.
New term,new self
After two months break the routine of school life ,another new term has begin,and we have to gone through a lot of things.
With each new term comes the opportunity for change .We should have a study plan to promote myself.
I feel very exciting,and I'm proud that I became to be a bilingual student report of Shanghai Students' Post.Certainly,I should study harder.I'm supposed to become mature by myself .The new term gives me a chance to make decisions and set goals .I need to plan a new destination when the new term has begin..We need to change some bad habits that we will not to do the false things likes to waste time any longer.Making goals means that you need to take actions ,so get start as soon as you can .Also ,it is very important that we have an good ambition and the personality.Change your bad habits can make you wit sparkles.Come on ,use this time to make some improvements.
Just remember :it is a new term ,new start

英文作文改进~谢.New term,new self After two months break the routine of school life ,another new term has begin,and we have to gone through a lot of things.With each new term comes the opportunity for change .We should have a study plan to pro
你的英语水平就初二来讲已经不错了,很多的单词和句式都超过了初二的范围,不过还是有一些问题,你看对不对.
首句我就有点看不懂了,After 2 months' break,是两个月的休息之后,直接加another new term...就好,为什么要加上the routine of school life,要表达什么呢,应该去掉,这个routine没必要在这里炫耀一下.还有,最好写成所有格2 months' break或two-month-break,约定俗成的.还有we have to go through(这里gone错了）a lot of things不如改成We have a lot of things ahead waiting for us更体现你的期待中透着紧张.
后面两段最大的问题是没有逻辑连接词,每句话都是独立的,这在英语中是比较忌讳的,可能你们现在没有意识到,不过外国人写作,最注重逻辑的关联性.我的建议是,将一半的（没有必要全部）简单句,联合成为复杂句,比如什么状语从句,定语从句等,剩下的用and、but、however、in addition、because等等的连词连上,每句话都是跟上一句或几句有一定的逻辑层次的.这样写出来的文章才地道.这方面初中甚至高中都不太重视,但希望你能体会到.
比如第二段：As we all know,with a new term comes more opportunities for changes,so there is a need for us to have a study plan to promote ourselves(to adapt to the change).你看,第二段还是那些内容,但是两句话变成了有内在联系的一句话,而且句式变化比你的还要丰富,看着还要舒服,括号里的可加可不加.
第三段第一句改为excited,就不解释了.became后不可以加to be,直接成为双语学生,还要就是那个report是什么意思?你怎么可以变成report?不明白你要表达什么.整个第三段逻辑确实有些混乱,有些句子没有表述清楚,所以我按照我自己的意思给你改了一下,可能不好,将就看吧,对照你自己的：
I feel really excited and proud because I have become a billingual student to give reports for Shanghai Students'Post.But still,I have to study even harder and try to become mature by myself although I have made some progress.Since the new term gives me a chance to make decisions and set goals,I have planned many things at the start of the new term.First of all,I need to give up some bad habits,like wasting time,being late for school and so on.In addition,I think it is very important that we set up a goal which means that you need to take actions once you have made up your mind.Last but not least,we should try to make our personality pleasing and attractive.
So come on and take this chance to improve yourself.And don't forget:with a new term,comes a brand-new self!
那个什么改变坏习惯让你的智慧闪光的话是不会给你的作文加分的.因为你把它放在了人格那句的后面,没有逻辑啊（更何况我不赞同这句话,嘿嘿）.还有,结尾要呼应主题啊,你不是新的自己吗,那结尾怎么又新的开始了呢,文章首末可以呼应,结尾和标题也可以呼应!很多小细节我就不说了,直接看我改后的吧,虽然水平不高,但也有提示的作用是吧,看在这么辛苦的份上给我分吧!

New term,new self
After two months' break, the routine school life--another new term begins.So we have to deal with a lot of things.
Each new term comes with the opportunities to change ...

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New term,new self
After two months' break, the routine school life--another new term begins.So we have to deal with a lot of things.
Each new term comes with the opportunities to change oursleves.I would make a plan to improve myself.
I feel very exciting because I'm proud that I became a bilingual student reporter(是指人吗？) of Shanghai Students' Post.As a students,of course I should study harder.I'm supposed to become mature by myself .The new term gives me a chance to make decisions and set goals . I need to set up a new goal when new term begins.We need to give up some bad habits ,so we will not to do the wrong things like wasting time any .Once you Make a goal , you need to take actions .Just get start as soon as you can ! Also , it is very important that we have an good ambition(忘记它是不是可数的了) and the personality.Giving up your bad habits can make you wit sparkles.Come on ,use this time to make some improvements.
Just remember :it is a new term ,a new start to face a mew life!
本人斗胆改了改
额，就这样吧，改了改，不知满意否，有些地方不太清楚你想说什么。。。
提个意见，思路好像不太条理，建议写之前列个提纲什么的。。

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